Happy Monday!

As we get farther into the “Holiday’s” I’m reminded that the New Year is right around the corner.  For me that means setting goals for the new year, a new start, a fresh perspective and opportunity to change the course of my life.  It’s a time to allow my mind to imagine and nurture my dreams. I find that exhilarating.

As you think about your life today and then compare it to next year at this time, what do you imagine your life will look like? What dreams to you have for your life?  You may want to begin the dreaming process and start collecting ideas for your new life…

I love this quote, “To dream anything that you want to dream. That’s the beauty of the human mind. To do anything that you want to do. That is the strength of the human will. To trust yourself to test your limits. That is the courage to succeed.”- Bernard Edmonds

Happy Dreaming…

Last weekend I presented a workshop at a conference for early learning, child development educators.  The topic was Eliminating Stress.  Here are some highlights.

Our world is a stressful place these days.  Everywhere we turn there’s a new disaster.   The rise in human tragedies, environmental disasters and financial crisis has made stress, fear and anxiety the new norm.

Add to that the stress in rising gas and food prices, increased cancer risks, rises in unemployment, increased cost for medical care and the list goes on and on, doesn’t it?

Then combine all this with stress from our jobs, bosses, relationships, neighbors, commuting, dieting, exercising, raising kids, school and the pressures and expectations we place on ourselves…

Ever feel like you are not doing as much as you should, or perhaps like you’ll never be good enough?  If yes is your answer, that’s because we have collectively allowed ourselves to be spoon-fed these messages.  For example, most commercials on TV and magazine ads are geared toward making us feel we are only good enough if…. we buy this, look like that, or think like them…

So we go to the gym to feel good about ourselves, and even there we begin to compare ourselves to others, and we find ourselves feeling less than good enough.  For some this makes us want to work harder, accumulate more, climb higher thinking it will make us feel better.   Sometimes we think, “if only I had this, or looked like that or got a lucky break like so and so.  And our stress continues to rise.

The truth is no amount of outside “stuff” will fill that void.  It must be filled from the inside through recognizing, acknowledging and appreciating who we were created to be.  It comes from truly supporting ourselves.

We cannot control the disasters in the world, but we can control our reaction and response to it.  We can begin to build a strong inner environment.  We can begin to support ourselves at a deeper level.  We can build a safe inner refuge…

We can make ourselves a priority by setting aside 10-15 minutes each day to de-stress, relax, and to be with ourselves, meditating or engaging in some activity that relaxes and nourishes our soul.

There are many tips and tools we can engage in when we feel ourselves experiencing stress like, Deep Breathing, Consciously Relaxing Key Muscles, Shake It Out, Yawn & Stretch, firing our anchor and more presented in the workshop.

Even though we cannot control the many stressful events in the world, we can turn inward to create a peaceful inner refuge of self-support.  By engaging in healthy activities and utilizing the many tools available, we can transform and eliminate stressful reactions to external events.

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Your comments & feedback are always welcome and encouraged.

For an appointment call 206-459-2898 or

E-mail me at: patricia@integritylifecoach.com

Home page http://www.integritylifecoach.com

Copyright© 2011 Patricia Eslava Vessey…All Rights Reserved

New Year’s Resolutions and Goals are at the forefront for us during this time of year.  With so many different ways to think about and construct goals, you may find this approach helpful.

This is the first in a series of posts to support you in successfully setting and achieving your goals in 2011.  Return to this blog to read the next tips.

1. Know what you want not what you think you want, or what you think others think you should want, or not what you think you should want.

2. Think about your goal options: spend quiet undisturbed time with eyes closed thinking about options for a goal.  If you had a goal this year, what would it be? What would truly support you as a goal this year? Questions such as, “What do I really want for myself this year” will help to prepare you for what follows. You’ll probably have lots of goal/options.  Allow them to surface and spend time thinking about each one.

3. Screen the goal options: spend time with each option and notice what thoughts come to mind as you think about each goal/option.  What would your life look like having achieved that goal? How would your life be different if you achieved that goal?  Then notice how you would feel achieving this goal.  What would you be telling yourself as you achieve that goal?  What do you want to experience?

Example-Goal: To lose weight- 20 lbs.  My life would be filled with more opportunities.  I would take more risks. I would feel less self-conscious.  I’d be more physically active and look better in my clothes and feel confident.  I would feel very good about myself and I’d say, YAY, I did it!  That would feel great.

Stay tuned for Part 2…

Visit my website to learn more about services and products to support you.

Stay tuned for Part 2 Success Tips to Set & Achieve Your Goals in 2011

Hey everyone,  If you work in social services/social work and you are looking for a great coach training program you may be interested in this new program offered at the Highline Community College.  Fran Fisher, MCC former owner and founder of the Academy for Coach Training and the Living Your Vision program has teamed with the college to offer this quality program.   Check it out.  Warmest wishes, Patricia

Burst for Prosperity and Highline Community     College Coaching for Prosperity^© Training Program

Burst for Prosperity, in partnership with community organizations and a Master Certified Coach, has developed a coaching training program for frontline staff working with low-income individuals. The Coaching for Prosperity^© program enhances the way service providers meet the needs of low-income adults to successfully complete some form of post-secondary education and achieve long-term financial success.

By training staff to use a collaborative approach that focuses on participants’ strengths rather than deficits, this new coaching model transforms the way caseworkers and other professionals work with clients. Staff who complete this training learn how to effectively empower individuals to take control of their own success and move permanently out of poverty by encouraging collaborative goal setting, trust building, listening, and networking.

Burst for Prosperity is now offering two training options through Highline Community College:

• Three-Quarter Certificate Program. This program, beginning with the class Introduction to Coaching, allows you to work with a professional coach to go deeper in your learning of the coaching technique. Located on the main campus, the program offers 9 college credits and 60 CCEU credits with the International Coach Federation www.coachfederation.org.

Tuesdays, September 21-December 7, 6pm – 9pm (1 Saturday class required)

Main Campus Building 99, Room 132

Highline Community College

2400 South 240th Street

Des Moines, WA 98198

Quarter Fee: $319

• Six-Day Intensive Program, which delivers the training in a more condensed and customizable format and includes 6 individual monthly follow-up sessions.  This training can be delivered anytime, in any location.  Call for fee information.

MORE ABOUT THE TRAINING PROGRAM

Following the 11 coaching competencies of the International Coach Federation, the Coaching for Prosperity Training Program provides the training and practice to build coaching skills for addressing specific life and career issues when working with clients in low-income situations. You will learn the basic skills and tools for professional coaching that ultimately empower individuals in making life and career changes to transition out of poverty.

Training Course Outline

Participants will:

• Build understanding of the coaching paradigm, including the definition, purpose, philosophy, and principles
• Learn to create life plans and establish goals and action steps for such life decisions as career, relationships, financial, and personal well-being
• Demonstrate coaching skills such as listening, observation and feedback skills, asking powerful questions and requests, brainstorming, and acknowledgement
• Learn highly effective coaching skills through experiential exercises and activities, such as:
  • Peer coaching sessions, observations and feedback
  • Case studies specific to working with people in low-income situations
  • Practicing and problem solving with a Master Certified Coach
  • Field work  – practicing coaching with a private client
• Private personal coaching sessions 1:1 with an accredited coach

Learning Objectives

Participants will:

• Demonstrate the basic elements of coaching and explain how it is different from other methods of working with clients
• Develop tools that include networking and community resources related to support for clients in low-income situations
• Effectively facilitate development of individualized goals and planning
• Use coaching skills and techniques effectively with clients in low-income situations
• Demonstrate highly effective trust-building and problem solving skills
• Confidently demonstrate the 11 International Coaching Federation Core Coaching Competencies and standards of ethical conduct
• Become grounded in the coaching paradigm: empowerment versus entitlement; asset and strength-building versus deficit-focused; client-centered versus system-centered; asking versus telling.

6-Day Intensive TRAINING

Basic Training* – for those who want the basic skills and tools of coaching to augment and enhance their effectiveness.

• Pre-Course written assignment
• 6 One-Day workshops
• 6 monthly 3-hour in-person follow-up peer sessions (or ten 2-hour teleconference sessions)
• Manual included (text book $30 not included)
• Certificate for 60 hours ICF* CCEU’s towards ACC accreditation

Fee: $750

Basic Training PLUS* – for those who also aspire to achieve their ICF ACC accreditation.  Training includes the Basic Training program, plus:

• 3 private 1:1 coaching sessions with an ICF accredited coach
• 6 coaching sessions with a practicum client

Fee: $750 basic plus $650 = $1,400 total

*Training Details

Concurrent with the 6-month Peer follow-Up Sessions:

• (3) 1:1 coaching sessions – You will work 1:1 with an ICF accredited coach, who will provide support in staying on track and in action, clearing obstacles, and celebrating accomplishments. Students will:
  • Continue to learn about coaching through the experience of being a client
  • Benefit by the ongoing support for your personal and professional development
  • Sustain your professional credibility as you work with your own clients
  • Provide a personal inventory prior to your first session and a preparation form for each session with your coach

• (6) Practicum client coaching sessions** with a self-assessment report for each session.  Students will:
  • Be responsible for finding and contracting with your client
  • Submit six self-assessment reports to course instructor

**It is preferred that you work with someone in a low-income situation, coaching that same client 6 times so that you can track and measure their progress and results.

International Coach Federation

This training curriculum adheres to the philosophy, ethics and standards, and core competencies of the International Coach Federation (ICF).  For those interested in obtaining ICF Accreditation at the Associate Certified Coach (ACC) level, the certification requirements include:

• 60 approved coaching skills specific training hours
• 10 hours working with a mentor coach
• 100 hours logged experience with at least 8 private clients.
• 2 reference letters acknowledging your competency at ACC level or above
• Application fees: $300
• Oral Exam

Renewal of certification is required every three years by clocking in 10 hours with a mentor coach and 40 CCEU continuous learning hours.

Questions?

For more information on the Highline Community College program, please go to www.burstforprosperity.com/coaching or call Jorja Gunderson, Program Manager of Continuing Education, at 206-878-3710 ext. 3608.

You may register for the Three-Quarter-Certificate Program on Highline Community College’s website [http://ce.highline.edu] or by calling Jorja Gunderson at 206-878-3710 ext. 3608.  If you’re interested in the Six-Day Intensive Program, please call Jorja and ask how you can arrange for a training today.

If you’re interested in training for managing supervisors of frontline staff or agency teams, contact Diana Dollar at 206-527-3885 for more information.

If you’d like to know more about ICF certification as part of the Coaching for Prosperity training, please contact Fran Fisher at 425-401-1374.

I recently presented a seminar on clarifying coaching competencies to a group of early childhood trainers.  First I want to acknowledge anyone who works in this stressful, highly demanding and sorely acknowledged profession.  You have my utmost respect and admiration.

The purpose of the seminar was to review the 11 core coaching competencies as defined by the International Coach Federation and for participants to learn and practice basic coaching skills including Active Listening and Powerful Questioning. 

As a way of practicing these skills I had participants work in pairs and answer the following questions.

1. If you could do anything you wanted with no limitations, what would it be?
2. What am I willing to say no to?
3. What am I committed to for my quality of life, and
4. What do I need to complete in order to feel a sense of freedom?

 While I used these questions for the purpose of practicing listening and questioning skills, they are great coaching questions to contemplate as you move forward and create more of what you want in your life.  To explore them in more detail…

Take some time now to answer question 1.  Then answer,

1. What would it mean to you if you did this?
2. What would it take for you to do this?
3. And then, list three steps you could take to do it. 

Spending time thinking and writing about what you want will turn the spot light on what you want and illuminate the choices to make to manifest them. 

Many blessings to you as you do this important work.

Patricia

Be gentle with yourself.  If you will not be your own unconditional friend, who will be?  If you are playing an opponent and you are also opposing yourself – you are going to be outnumbered.

- Dan Millman

I love this quote about being gentle with ourselves – being our own unconditional friend. 

Most of us are not aware of our inner relationship. Often our self-talk is negative, hurtful and unsupportive.  We would never talk to a close friend this way, yet it flows with ease when we direct it at us. Why is that?  If our environment is also negative and unsupportive, what happens to us at a deep level with all this negativity? I believe we hold this negativity within us and it festers away causing even more internal damage including health problems.

You may wonder Why this so important, especially if you believe you are only hurting yourself…and/or sadly you think you don’t deserve anything better. When we hurt ourselves, not only do we dwell in the purgatory of self defeat, we also rob others of the very best of us. Those who depend on us, work with us or live with us get short changed.  How much patience, understanding, love and companionship do we really have to offer when we are not blessing ourselves by being gentle, loving and supportive inwardly?

Maybe this makes sense to you.  You know you need to improve your inner relationship and you are wondering how to do do it – where to start…

Begin by creating a vision of how you want to “be” with yourself, and spend time answering these questions.

What would it look like, how would you talk to yourself, especially when you didn’t meet your own expectations? How would you support yourself? 

What would your life like if you were gentle with yourself, and your own unconditional friend? 

How would you feel, think and be with yourself?

Spending time on creating a strong inner foundation will help you in all areas of your life.  Won’t you begin this vital work now? 

Many blessings, hope and love to you,
Patricia

Your comments & feedback are always welcome and encouraged. For an appointment call 206-459-2898 or e-mail me at: patricia@integritylifecoach.com Home page http://www.integritylifecoach.com Copyright© 2008 Patricia Eslava Vessey…All Rights Reserved